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Disclaimer | Foreword |
Contact Info | Introduction |
RAD | MRG IS NOW OPEN! |
this site contains language commonly heard in seedy bars which some may find objectional and/or offensive
Foreword |
top of page |
As a matter of fact not only will his mere presence cause women and children to evacuate (themselves as well as the premises), he has even cleared sailors out of bars with his repulsive foul-mouth vocabulary, which is the main reason for the creation of this acronym vocabulary in the first place.
The other reason is because after a few too many beers, even the most articulate redneck becomes hard-pressed to say even his favorite phrases without developing a severe case of tongue-knots, which can really bring a conversation to a crawl.
Being as Billy-Bob Jimmy-Joe-Bob Billy-Joe-Jim-Bob-Boy Jones
is functionally illiterate we were forced to transcribe his intro from a
tape recording. We had to use a computer program to decypher his monologue,
however no effort has been made to make it any more intelligible than
it was on the tape.
(if anyone can figure out what
the hell he said... would you please let us know?)
- L & A
The Montana Roadsign Gallery
What do you get when you mix Rednecks, Rifles and Roadsigns?
A complete waste of our tax dollars, that's what!
What's even more moronic is some of these signs included
are HARDLY A STONES THROW OUT OF TOWN! In fact, one of the signs is three blocks from
my freakin house (which is definitely in the middle of town).
We here at MT REDNEX are hardpressed to even imagine the level of non-intelligence that
would be responsible for such a display of complete brainlessness. We hope that by
illustrating the resulting anal atrosity it just may make some of these people
perform an actual attempt at thinking (although we have the feeling that most likely
the people responsible would suffer a grand mal seizure if even one of their
neurons were to so much as accidently activate). Let's all hope this
is (and is not) the case.
L & A would also like to point out that even though we are not fond
of roadsigns littering the landscape we realize that at least some of them do in fact
perform a necessary function and without regard to whether that is actually the case
or not, that shooting them full of holes does nothing more than ventilate them, thereby
helping to keep them from blowing over in a gale force wind . Personally, we'd prefer
they didn't have the holes so they would be more likely to blow over
during a severe storm (as a blown-over sign is out of sight, quickly overgrown and
hopefully forgotten by the highway department).
We have decided to include as a public service our Redneck Driving Instruction section to help you gain proficiency in proper Redneck Driving techniques.
Introduction
Wunner thimthar soaryaz coe me dee un basterdz reesenly come popler aza dolleradip hoe unuh cattledrov un probly made hiz sef wun sheetloader grinback tillun thez gawd am ridnick stow reez.Earnly problim iz thez stow reez aint rilly no ridnick stow reez atoll uz inny realuz sheetun yer boot ridnickell till ya. Akchully thez wuz gawd am inbred hill billee stow reez. An yoozkinz takes mah word un thiz... becuzzin ah knowz furst han bout thiz hill billee sheet!
Ferwunthang, uh ridnicks kin haintgots no uze fer wunner thimthar moe beal home thangs, az hiz gots hiz sef uh sprid biggernuftah stritch tah hailen back wif mur headercattle thin yooz ken shake yer greezy dickat.
Fernother thang, no sef rispictun ridnick udbrangah beer tah no job interveeoo; idbeeyuh fiffer jackdanyulz oh jimbeam er mebeefun boter thim!.
Contact Info L & A can be reached for comment at the following Email address: